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Anne 1

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Script: Part 5

SCENE: The Cuthbert kitchen.

MARILLA: Did you bring the pudding?

ANNE: Excuse me for a minute, Marilla; here's something I've got to check outside for a moment.

MARILLA: What do you have to check? Oh, that girl.

ANNE: Perhaps we should have the plum pudding without the sauce.

MARILLA: Whatever for? I've never served it without the sauce.

ANNE: I forgot to put the cheese cloth over it last night. I was imagining I was a nun, on my way to the altar to take the vows--

MARILLA: Well, then you were lucky that the mice had sense enough to stay away from it. [knock at door] Oh, goodness gracious. Who could that be now, at this hour just before supper? Oh, Miss Stacy!

MISS STACY: Good evening, Miss Cuthbert. Well, I was just over at the Barry's and, well, I thought I'd take the opportunity to stop by.

MARILLA: What has she done, now? I hope this carfuffle with Diana Barry hasn't made her neglect her studies.

MISS STACY: No. No, no, not at all--quite the contrary. Anne is doing simply excellent work, which is why I'm here. I wondered, would you permit her to join a special class? You see, I intend to give extra classes after school for those students who intend to take the entrance exams at Queens.

MARILLA: The college in Charlottetown? Our Anne?

MISS STACY: She's bright and energetic, and, well, very determined. I think that she could pass for a teacher, or even go on to the university.

MARILLA: Well, I always thought that a girl should learn to make a living; it's a very insecure world. Well, of course she can join the class, if she wants to.

MISS STACY: Well, that is wonderful!

MARILLA: Why don't you stay for supper? I'm just about to set the table.

MISS STACY: Oh, no. Oh, no. I-- Really, I couldn't impose.

MARILLA: Oh, stuff and nonsense! You wouldn't be imposing at all, and then you can tell Anne all about it, yourself.

MISS STACY: Well, alright.

SCENE: The Cuthbert living room.

MISS STACY: That was a delicious din, Miss Cuthbert.

MARILLA: Oh, thank you, Miss Stacy. Anne actually made this plum pudding herself.

MISS STACY: Oh really? Well, I can hardly wait to taste it.

MARILLA: Oh, please, do.

ANNE: DON'T EAT IT, MISS STACY!

MARILLA: Anne, what is wrong with you?

ANNE: A mouse drowned in the sauce, Marilla. I was working up the courage to tell you when Miss Stacy came and...

MARILLA: Anne, if you intend to go for teacher, you are going to have to give up your featherbrained ways. You are not interested in anything but your silly daydreams and nothing else.

ANNE: I really am trying to overcome my faults, Marilla. I chatter on far too much. But if you only knew how many things I want to say and don't, you'd give me some credit.

MISS STACY: [laughs]

ANNE: Well, I suppose in the end it was a romantic way to perish, for a mouse.

SCENE: The schoolhouse.

MISS STACY: Marissa.

STUDENT: Thank you.

MISS STACY: Good afternoon. Diana.

DIANA: Thank you, Miss Stacy.

MISS STACY: You're welcome.

ANNE: Aren't you going to be in the Queen's class?

DIANA: Mother says I should concentrate on learning to run a household instead of pouring over books so much.

ANNE: Oh, Diana. I feel as though you've tasted the bitterness of death.

MISS STACY: Alright class. Let's start with the Latin verbs. We'll move on to algebra after that. Please open your books at page three.

SCENE: The Cuthbert kitchen.

MARILLA: Now be sure you get Matthew's meals on time, and I should be home tomorrow before supper.

ANNE: Have a lovely time. Do you think you'll meet the prime minister?

MARILLA: Oh, if Rachel has anything to do with it, we'll more than meet him. He shall be subjected to a lecture on the ills of Prince Edward Island, the country, and the world -- in that order. Be good.

ANNE: Bye.

SCENE: The Cuthbert living room.

ANNE: Mrs. Lynde says the country's going to the dogs, the way the government runs things. Do you think that's true, Matthew?

MATTHEW: Rachel Lynde is a Grit.

ANNE: She says, "If women were allowed to vote, we would soon see a blessed change." Which way do you vote, Matthew?

MATTHEW: I vote Conservative.

ANNE: Then I'm a Conservative, too. I'm glad 'cause Gil--, I mean, some of the boys at school are Grits. Ruby Gillis says that when a man is courting, he always has to agree with the girl's mother in religion and her father in politics. Ruby Gillis knows all about courting because she has three older sisters. Did you ever go courting, Matthew?

MATTHEW: Well, I don't knows if I have.

ANNE: Never, ever, ever? [he shakes his head no] Why ever not?

MATTHEW: Well, I couldn't do it without talking to a girl.

ANNE: Well, I'm sure there were many broken hearts as a result.

MATTHEW: Oh, go on.

ANNE: Ruby Gillis says when she grows up, she wants to have a line of beaus on a string and make them crazy for her. I'd rather have one in his rightful mind. There are some things in this world that even I cannot hope to understand.

MATTHEW: Well, I don't know if I can comprehend all of them, either.

ANNE: Diana?

DIANA: My little sister's awful sick with the croup, and Mary Joe's babysitting. She doesn't know what to do. And we can't get word to mother and father because they're at the rally still.

ANNE: Don't worry, Diana. Matthew will get the doctor. We're such kindred spirits, I can read his thoughts.

DIANA: Dr. Blair's at the rally, too. Oh, Anne, I'm scared. The baby can't breathe.

ANNE: Get my coat, Diana. Stop crying, Diana. I know exactly what to do for the croup. Ipecac is an expectorant. Mrs. Hammond's three sets of twins all had croup regularly, Diana, and it was me that treated them.

SCENE: The Barry house.

ANNE: She's pretty bad, but I've seen worse. Put some wood in the stove, Mary Joe, and boil some water. I don't mean to hurt your feelings, but you might have thought of that before if you'd had any imagination. Diana, get a fresh change of clothes, and I'll keep administering the ipecac. [later] I've given her the last of the ipecac. Mary Joe, look after the water. We'll change the muster plaster. [still later, to doctor] I gave her every last drop of ipecac, but it wasn't until she coughed up the phlegm that she really began to improve. You must imagine my relief, doctor. Some things cannot be expressed in words.

DOCTOR: Would have been too late by the time I got here. You saved this little baby's life.

SCENE: On a road.

ANNE: I can't go to school. I can barely keep my eyes open. But I hate to stay at home; Gil will get ahead and...

MATTHEW: Gid'yup!

SCENE: The Cuthbert kitchen.

ANNE: Good morning.

MARILLA: Afternoon's more like it, Anne. You slept the day away, though no one's ever been more entitled to it, I hear.

ANNE: Did you meet the prime minister? What does he look like?

MARILLA: Well, he certainly didn't become prime minister on account of his looks, but he's a fine speaker. He shook my hand.

ANNE: How exciting. I can just imagine the thrill of the rally with all those people.

MARILLA: Mrs. Barry was over here before begging to see you. I wasn't about to wake you. You're invited to dinner. I should imagine humble pie is on the menu.

ANNE: Marilla, may I go right now? I'm aching to see Diana.

SCENE: The Barry house.

MRS. BARRY: I'm so ashamed, Anne. You saved my baby's life.

ANNE: I harbor no hard feelings toward you, Mrs. Barry. I hope you believe me once and for all that I never meant to intoxicate Diana.

MRS. BARRY: Of course I believe you, child. I'm so sorry I ever doubted you.

DIANA: Mother says you can come with us to the Christmas ball at Carmody.

MRS. BARRY: And we'd be honored if you'd stay the night with Diana as well. It's a very special occasion, and you would be our guest of honor.

SCENE: The Cuthbert living room.

MARILLA: You can calm down because you're not going. For a woman so adamantly against current wine, I'm surprised she's allowing Diana to go. The ball is for adults, not children.

ANNE: But Marilla, it's Christmas. The minister's gonna to be there. He's giving an address, and that's almost the same as a sermon.

MARILLA: You heard what I said, and you know what I meant by it. There'll be plenty of balls when you're older.

ANNE: I was invited to spend the night. I'm to be the guest of honor.

MARILLA: Ah, well, it's just an honor you'll have to forego, aye? Now off to bed.

ANNE: This is a wound I shall bear forever. Good night.

MATTHEW: You'd have been proud of her presence of mind, the way she saved that Barry baby. Why don't you let her go?

MARILLA: Remember, Matthew, who we agreed would be raising her. Mrs. Barry just wants to ease her conscience, and I'm not going to allow it. And no amount of huffing and puffing from you, is going to change my mind. You'd let her go to the moon, if she had the notion. Well, I don't approve of balls. Just full her head with nonsense.

MATTHEW: Fact is, Marilla, you never went to a ball. Fact is, this whole idea's got you scared to death. That little girl ought to have all the kindness we can give her. We've got no call to raise her as cheerless as we was. It ain't interfering to have an opinion. Besides, it's Christmas. You ought to let her go.

SCENE: The Cuthbert kitchen.

MARILLA: Alright, you can go. This is all Matthew's doing, though; I wash my hands of it. If you get overheated and catch pneumonia, blame Matthew.

ANNE: Marilla, I dreamt last night that I arrived at the ball in puffed sleeves and everyone was overcome by my regal am--

MARILLA: Regal, my eye. You're dripping dirty, greasy water all over my clean floor! And if I have to listen to anymore of this, I'll just change my mind, that's what I'll do.

SCENE: Lawson's Mercantile

ALICE LAWSON: Well, Mr. Cuthbert, what can I do for you today?

MATTHEW: Well, now, uh... I'd like, uh... Have you got any, uh... Do you have any garden rakes?

ALICE LAWSON: Now, we don't carry garden rakes in the store in December, but I'll check upstairs. We may have one or two in storage. [leaves; returns] The very last one.

MATTHEW: Oh, that's nice.

ALICE LAWSON: Will there be anything else, Mr. Cuthbert?

MATTHEW: Well, since you suggested, uh... I might want to look at some hayseed.

ALICE LAWSON: Oh, we don't carry hayseed till spring, Mr. Cuthbert.

MATTHEW: Oh, certainly. Of course.

ALICE LAWSON: That'll be 75 cents for the rake, Mr. Cuthbert.

MATTHEW: Uh, while I'm here, uh... I might want to look at, uh... If it wouldn't be too much trouble, uh...

ALICE LAWSON: Yes...

MATTHEW: Sugar.

ALICE LAWSON: Sugar?

MATTHEW: Some sugar.

ALICE LAWSON: Oh, white or brown?

MATTHEW: Well, uh... What would you say?

ALICE LAWSON: Well, we have some nice brown sugar in stock, Mr. Cuthbert. How much would you like?

MATTHEW: Well... Would twenty pounds be enough?

ALICE LAWSON: Yes, I'm sure twenty pounds would be enough. That'll be $1.

MATTHEW: [whispering] I need a dress. With puffed sleeves.

ALICE LAWSON: Puffed sleeves?

MATTHEW: For Anne.

ALICE LAWSON: For land's sake, Mr. Cuthbert, why didn't you say so in the first place? Now, you just come with me to the window.

SCENE: The Cuthbert kitchen.

ANNE: Oh! It's so beautiful!

MARILLA: Brown sugar, indeed. I knew Matthew was up to some foolishness.

ANNE: Marilla, look at the puffs.

MARILLA: They're ridiculous. You'll have to turn sideways to get through the doors.

ANNE: This can't be real.

MARILLA: I hope your satisfied, young lady. I don't want you strutting around here vain as a peacock, so now you go upstairs and take that off.

ANNE: I have to thank Matthew.

MARILLA: Twenty pounds of brown sugar.

SCENE: The barn.

MATTHEW: I should have waited till Christmas, but I thought you might want to wear it to the ball. Don't you like it?

ANNE: Like it? It's more exquisite than any dress I could ever have imagined.

MATTHEW: Puffed sleeves.

ANNE: The puffiest in the world. You are a man of impeccable taste, Matthew.

MATTHEW: I don't want to get your dress dirty.

SCENE: The ball.

MRS. BARRY: Diana. Enjoy yourselves tonight, okay? Hello, John, Martha, Elizabeth. How are you?

ANNE: I'm positively certain this will spoil everyday life forever.

DIANA: In three years, I'm going to wear my hair like Alice Bell. She's only seventeen and I think she looks ridiculous. I'm going to wait until I'm eighteen. My, my. Doesn't Gilbert look dashing tonight?

ANNE: Gilbert? I hadn't noticed him.

DIANA: It's too bad you've been so awful to him--he might of asked you to dance.

ANNE: If I wanted him to ask me, which I don't, he certainly would. Gilbert Blythe would stand on his head for me if I asked him to.

DIANA: Ah! He looked right at you again, Anne! I bet you couldn't get him to dance with you.

ANNE: Alright, Diana. If you insist. [goes over to Gilbert] Good evening, Mr. Blythe.

GILBERT: [to a friend] Tell your brother I'll be seeing him at the tobogganing party.

PUNCH WOMAN: A glass of punch?

ANNE: Thank you.

GILBERT: Diana! You look wonderful tonight. Merry Christmas!

DIANA: Merry Christmas to you too, Gilbert.

ANNE: How could you wish that person a merry Christmas?

DIANA: I gather that person didn't ask you to dance, after all. Well, will you give me the pleasure instead?

ANNE: Thank you. I believe I will.

SCENE: A room in the Barry house.

DIANA: I think Gilbert took your dance card.

ANNE: Such a romantic gesture would be utterly beyond his imagination.

DIANA: Well then who? Josie Pie?

ANNE: A secret admirer, obviously.

DIANA: We should get to bed before mother comes down. She said we could sleep in the spare bedroom. Isn't that exciting?

ANNE: Alright, then. I'll race you to see who get the warm side of the bed. Ready? Get set. Go!

SCENE: The spare bedroom.

AUNT JOSEPHINE: Oh! Merciful heavens! What is the meaning of this?

DIANA: Aunt Josephine. Mother said you weren't coming until tomorrow.

AUNT JOSEPHINE: Is that any reason to try to kill me in my sleep? Diana Barry, you are the worst behaved girl I have ever known. Your parents will certainly hear about this outrage.

ANNE: It's all my fault, ma'am. It was my idea to race.

DIANA: And we didn't know you were in here. Honestly, we didn't. Please don't tell mother, Aunt Jo. We're terribly sorry.

AUNT JOSEPHINE: I most certainly will tell her. She'll want to know the reason why I changed my mind about the music lessons I was going to pay for. You need a few lessons in behavior more than in music, young lady. Now get out of here and let a poor old woman get some sleep.

SCENE: The hallway.

DIANA: This is really dreadful, Anne. I've always wanted music lessons, and she's the only one in the family who's rich enough to pay for them.

ANNE: I'll explain tomorrow. Don't worry, Diana.

DIANA: She'll probably leave in a big huff first thing tomorrow morning. But I don't care. She's only father's great-aunt -- never been close. It was pretty funny, wasn't it? Did you see the look on her face?

ANNE: I can't have you lose your music lessons because of me. I'll just have to have a talk with her.

DIANA: Anne, don't. She'll eat you alive.

ANNE: I've had lots of practice in making apologizes before. Just leave it to me.


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